Saturday, November 18, 2006

Somebody Over at the Late Show Writing Staff Has a Serious Hard-On for Studio 60 (and/or 30 Rock)

I mean, I get it. If you count SNL, NBC now has three shows based on Saturday Night Live, and yeah, we may not be seeing them for very much longer, but jezz, give the poor guys a break...

(editor's note: these are just the first four we found; there may be others)

Top Ten Signs Your Television Show Is Going To Be Cancelled (Mon, Sep 18 2006)
10. It's entitled, "Everybody Loves Osama"
9. Instead of laughing, studio audience shouts, "Let's burn down the studio"
8. The frequent lulls while the lead character attempts to remember his lines
7. It stars the remains of Desi Arnaz
6. "Variety" calls it "A thrill ride similar to eating tainted spinach"
5. To keep costs down, show is taped by elevator security cameras
4. It nabbed the coveted 3 AM time slot
3. One of 15 NBC shows based on backstage at "Saturday Night Live"
2. The opening credits include the word "Hasselhoff"
1. Their big idea is something called "Ventriloquist Week"

Top Ten Surprises In Oprah's Interview With Madonna (Wed, Oct 25 2006)
10. Madonna named the kid Stedman
9. Dr. Phil wrestled to the ground by security before he could get to the stage and say some of his crap
8. Oprah changed show's format -- now set backstage at "Saturday Night Live"
7. Touching moment where baby went joyriding with Britney's kid
6. Madonna insisted on being interviewed on a 12-foot cross
5. Unveiled her new line of cone-shaped nursing bras
4. A confused Maury Povich came in with paternity test results
3. Got so excited, Madonna paid an assistant to jump on Oprah's couch
2. Madonna's admission that she enjoys using pine tar in the bedroom
1. Out of habit, Bill Clinton called to say it wasn't his

TOP TEN – Signs You’re Obsessed With “Lost” - presented by Jorge Garcia (of Lost) (Fri, Nov 10 2006)
10. After each episode, you do an all-kitty reenactment in your basement
9. You refer to your in-laws as "The Others"
8. While visiting New York, you stood over every manhole and screamed, "Good God -- a secret hatch"
7. You're halfway to your goal of licking every cast member
6. Your friend phoned during "Lost." Next day you beat him to death with a hot poker
5. You pitched NBC a show about 12 people stranded backstage at "Saturday Night Live"
4. Co-workers affectionately refer to you as "That loser who's obsessed with 'Lost'"
3. Renamed dental practice "Flost"
2. Your wife is getting sick of playing the bedroom game "Find the castaway"
1. You sat through all ten of these lame jokes

Top Ten Signs You're Watching A Bad James Bond Movie (Fri, Nov 17 2006)
10. Asks everyone to call him "Jimbo"
9. Villain's private "lair" is the corner booth at Pizzeria Uno
8. It's set backstage at "Saturday Night Live"
7. The Aston Martin won't start, so Bond drives a '95 Ford Focus
6. It's about Dr. No's even more evil brother, Dr. Phil
5. Most impressive gadget? A clock that's also a radio
4. Bond's new catchphrase: "Git R Done"
3. Goodbye license to kill, hello license to inspect meat
2. Soundtrack by Kevin Federline
1. Halfway into the movie, James Bond is shot in the face by Dick Cheney
bonus jokes:

# New Bond girl...Carol Channing
# Bond misses a bad guy when he has to empty all gels and liquids at airport security
# Always being rescued by his clever pet squirrel, 008
# He's wearing a hat that reads "Secret Agent"


Blogger Doctor Reeves said...

It's not about 30 Rock?

7:06 PM  

Post a Comment

<< Home